Spanked for real life
Here is a short from Jeanie B who originally posted a comment to the post ‘real life adult daughters still spanked.’ She kindly agreed not only to allow it to be posted in its own right, but expanded upon. It appears here in a slightly edited format as agreed with Jeanie.
I love this blog and was attracted to it by the corner time aspect to the title. I have been into spanking for as long as I can remember, but growing up, I never thought I would be. Until I found this and other blogs I thought I must be a bit weird. I am 32 now and have a satisfactory, if intermittent spanking relationship with a man I met online some years ago who lives in another state.
My first spanking was an embarrassing punishment when I was still at college. It was completely unexpected and came at me left field as things in life often do.
I was 20 and had just transferred to a new university after a complication at my first college that I won’t bore you with. It is sufficient to say my life was in a state of upheaval at the time and I think I was more open to what happened.
I found myself in a strange town and reluctant to go into halls again at my age so I was put on to a family who was by an odd coincidence a cousin of a teacher at my first college and an old college friend of a neighbour’s aunt from back home.
Coming from the East, the Mid-West was an alien country to me. College had a whole lot of rules out of the ark; another reason for me wanting to live off campus.
The family in question had an adult son who lived in another state and one 19-year-old daughter Anne, who went to the local community college and who lived at home. The father was a trucker and spent a lot of time away and they were only too happy to have a bit of extra money from a paying guest.
I have to say at this point that the money I paid was very little and came from my parents, so having me live there was a huge favour.
To cut what might turn out to be a long story short, I found out early that Anne was sometimes still spanked by her mother, Grace. Not that often I don’t think, but she was openly threatened with it on several occasions, much to her embarrassment and my secret thrill.
Twice during my first semester I came home to find her standing in the corner in just a short shirt, once having been spanked and in tears and once waiting to be spanked. The shirt on both occasions was long enough to cover her bottom, although I did see some redness at the top of her thighs. I was later told and myself found out more intimately, that the covering was a concession to her because I might come home as I had done.
The second time I got to hear Grace spanking Anne downstairs, after being ‘told’ to go to my room. On that occasion I resisted the temptation to sneak down and watch, but I became obsessed about it after that as you can imagine.
Anne wouldn’t talk much about it and what little she did say aroused my interest even more. I found out that corner time could be a public thing, with the daughter only being allowed to wear just enough for modesty. That really wasn’t that much and a couple of times later on I saw a peek of her bare bottom when she was made to put her hands on her head for back chat while still in the corner. But that was later and came as an embarrassing revelation as will become clear.
By public thing, I mean corner time when the family had visitors, which included friends of both genders.
Then at the start of my second semester I came home to find Anne in the corner in just a short sweat-top. I had made an unexpected return home so they didn’t know I was there. So instead of going in as normal, I went through the garage and hid in the kitchen to observe through the serving hatch which had been left slightly open.
I supposed sometimes I am a bit of a switch sexually, bi I mean, but I didn’t know that then. So I got a little ruffled seeing her bare behind and it confused me. But I put it down to the upcoming spanking, which it mostly was.
Grace was sitting in a chair reading with a hairbrush nearby for about 15 minutes after I started watching and I remember being scared she would come in to the kitchen at some point and got ready to run into the garage.
Then she told Anne to come to her. As she turned I could see she had a real attitude about it, not that that was going to last.
I couldn’t see the spanking too well as it was off to the side, but it was loud in both impacts and Anne’s yelling. All through it Grace would say stuff like ‘I’m going to blister your BEE-hind,’ which was how she talked and ‘you won’t sit for a week,’ which was all the stuff I read about and fantasised about.
I also learned that she was being spanked for going to a party where there was beer and had lied about it.
The most amazing thing was how Anne went from being a brat to crying her head off and saying she was sorry. The spanking went on for a real long time and for most of it Anne was saying sorry like that.
Then after she had to go and stand and face the wall again so I got to see the effects on her bottom. It was all dark red and puffed up all over and she was bawling her head off like a kid.
Grace put the brush down on the table like she might want to use it again and went to leave the room. I panicked and in my rush to get into the garage I knocked over a packet of flour that had been left on the work surface.
That is how Grace realised I had been there. So when I ‘came in’ 10 minutes later I was confronted by a real angry mom. She called me a sneak and a peeping tom. I just broke down and said I was sorry but that I had got curious.
I said I would leave, I was so embarrassed, which was when Grace said I was “just an immature and silly girl after all.”
Then she added, “So you are curious are you.”
That’s when I knew what would happen and my heart started pumping.
“That’s right,” Grace had a real weird look like an evil smile and we both knew I would let her spank me.
Nothing was said then, but I was sent to my room to get ready for bed and then told to come back down.
When I got back Grace was sitting on the couch with that hairbrush in her hand. Then she told Anne, who had been facing the wall the whole time, to turn around.
I don’t really remember how it happened but the next thing I knew I was over Grace’s lap with my PJ bottoms off and my behind sticking up.
I was embarrassed and scared the whole time, and Grace had me crying a bit with just the scolding before the spanking even got started.
The spanking was a shock. At first I didn’t quite take it in. It was just a crack and a blast on my behind. Then it hurt. Then it really, really hurt. Then I was thrashing about yelling my head off like a kid, crying from the start.
At first I kind of felt where the hairbrush was landing and that was pretty much all over my bottom. Then my backside was just one pain and I really got down to some serious hollering.
All my life I had been obsessing about spanking, but right then I was cured and I was very, very sorry.
At some point I started to yell out loud over and over that I was sorry, which I later found out was what Grace had been waiting for. Not that the spanking stopped right away, but I knew even then that it wasn’t half so bad as Anne had gotten.
Afterwards I had to stand next to Anne facing the wall while I had a good cry. But even though we had to stand there for a long time, all evening in fact, I did feel better. It was odd to me then, but by the time the worst of the pain had eased off I started to feel kind of cosy even through the embarrassment and throbbing behind.
Ever since I have always felt corner time was sort of therapeutic after a good sound spanking, but it is murder on the nerves beforehand.
After that first time Grace came to me in bed and we talked while she put some cold cream on my tail, a luxury that would not be afforded to me again. I made a genuine apology and sincerely thanked her for straightening me out. I really felt good about it.
She said something like, “You know there is a lot about your behaviour I don’t approve of. I think maybe you need taking in hand young lady.”
The next day I had dark stain like a birthmark all over my bottom which lasted in some form for almost a month. I think it went just in time for my next spanking.
Yes, after that I was spanked more often than Anne. I could have died the first time I had to stand in just my PJ tops and panties when Grace’s husband Frank was there; the panties her only concession for his presence. I was bare when it was just Grace and Anne.
Once I got used to being part of the family, this was nowhere near as bad as standing there in nothing but one of Frank’s old shirt’s having been or about to be spanked with people from the neighbourhood or some of Grace’s friends and relatives around. You can bet that Anne and I did not encourage our friend’s to call around much.
I graduated college three years later at 23 and I was soundly spanked about once a month the whole time I lived there. As was Anne until she moved out about a year before.
I am still in touch with Grace and sometimes she makes references ‘to those days’ in her mails. I still blush to think about it.
My interest in spanking intensified after that, although I never enjoyed them and don’t now. But I feel so much better afterwards. I think Grace knew and was happy to go along.
With hindsight I wonder if she enjoyed it too. When Anne and Frank weren’t around, she certainly thought of a couple of ways to augment my embarrassment and discomfort, but that is kind of private and one for another time maybe.
Thanks again for your blog and the chance to sound off.
Yours Jeanie B.
Thank you Jeanie.
Filed under: articles, domestic, F/F, real life | 73 Comments
Tags: 1990s, adult daughters, corner time, hairbrush, OTK, public corner time, spanking, spanking adult daughters
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Spanking, spanking stories and spanking articles for adults
This blog is intended for adults only. Spanking and other sexual activities represented here are intended for adults. Nothing here should be interpreted as advocating any non-consensual spanking activity or the spanking of minors.
All characters appearing in short stories on this blog are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
This blog aims to explore themes of erotic discipline, female submission and spanking. It features stories, anecdotes and observations by DJB and others.
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A Voice in the Corner 
Thanks for that awesome story. I am still amazed at this website. I can find no other quite like it! I am older than many of your fans, I think (46) but love to hear the stories of how we all got here. I attended Christian school in the 70s and was paddled often. Not because I was bad, really, I just have problems sitting still and being quiet. I have since turned these attributes into a great working career but it was hard on my bottom growing up. I was always made to feel ‘loved and cared for’ afterwords and was assured it was because they had my best interests at heart and wanted me to be a better girl. So I associate spanking with warm fuzzies and enjoy the intimacy of being otk. I have tried to figure out if there is more since spanking has thrilled me as far back as I can remember but it’s just to complicated so I usually just give in and enjoy it. I’ve been married for 16 years and hubby spanks when he is able but with kids in the house sometimes it’s more difficult because it tends to be a noisy event. This website allows me a little thrill and fun secret that I can go to when I want to feel connected and comfortable. So thank you, again for this site.
So long from Seattle,
Keri
Thanks for the kind words Keri 🙂
I am sure you are nowhere near the oldest on this blog – but I know from personal correspondence that there is a huge age range.
I am glad that school paddlings did not put you off (or are you saying that they put you on?) The loved and cared for dimension is oft overlooked.
DJ 😉
I don’t know if it’s how I got started or just that I was ‘lucky’. Hehe I think back on it and it seems very weird that a young teacher would paddle me because she wasn’t much older than me she just really believed in it. Once I was over 18 and started to get boyfriends I always picked strong, dominating boys/men and never had a problem getting them to spank. I was very shy at first but soon learned to ask for what I wanted and it usually worked out great. I had 1 boyfriend who didn’t seem the type so I knew I could never marry him. I would be frustraited forever. LOL. I like the psychological part of being otk because you feel very vulnerable and helpless even though in truth – if your with someone you trust – you’re really not. That gets me very excited in more ways than one. It’s just such a struggle to be aroused, scolded, a little scared, and contrite all at once. Like I said before I try to analyze it all but to no avail. My good friend likes to be spanked but never was growing up so I wonder where did her interest come from? I have never spent time ‘in the corner’ but enjoy when you write about it. It’s thrilling and continues the whole vulnerability/helpless part which I love. One problem I have is that I can take a pretty hard spanking w/o crying and I would really like to experience what it feels like to let go and sob like the girls in the stories. Any advice on what hubby could do to get me there? Without having to spank me so hard I have injuries 🙂 ? Would love to here from you, DJ. Thanks again. Oh and I’m a pirate today for Halloween. My whole team at work is dressing up. Too cool. I have a sword and everything. Although being as I’m not food wih it I think the ships Captian needs to remind me /his belt
Let’s talk soon,
Keri-brat
It makes me wonder why people keep repeating what doesn’t work.
I suppose it does Virginia
sorry Keri – but I missed your comment (from over a year ago) sorry – it is the problem with these long threads 😦
I hope you are still out there lurking.
Thank you Jeanie for that wonderful and detailed account. So few of us are lucky enough to have had such an experience. Of those, so few are willing to admit and retell their stories. I hope to hear more of your accounts.
Hi DJ,
I fear I may have scared you off by getting too personal and asking too many questions. I do apologize. I have never posted anywhere but here and I don’t want to alienate myself. I bought the Spanking Handbook and I’ll see if there are some answers there. I really haven’t found a site quite like yours and I feel the most comfortable here so hopefully I haven’t ‘overstayed’ my welcome already. 🙂
Thanks for the stories and delightfully strong men willing to teach us girls to behave.
Take care,
Keri
Hi Keri,
absolutely not 🙂
I’m sorry I haven’t replied to you (or anyone yet)
I have had a couple of emails asking me if something was wrong as I hadn’t posted for two days – but real life just broke in and I hadn’t queued anything up yet.
Post later today. 🙂
DJ
Hi Keri,
Me again Lol.
Thanks for your insight.
I have to say that crying is a personal thing – some women cry easily and some not at all..
I have to say that my stories (although they draw heavily on real experience) are not real life and often follow an idealised situation.
In my experience women rarely cry from pain (thank God) but from internal emotions like guilt or a sense of closeness.
It is often in what the man says and how he says it. Scolding for punishment situations often results from tears but a play spanking – no matter how hard – usually won’t.
OHM runs a forum called Sometimes a girl needs a spanking – if you decided to contribute there as OHM suggests – you may find other like-minded people and women who have a take on this.
Not that I want to discourage you from commenting here – not at all.
Please feel free to share any 18+ experience on this blog. 😉
yours,
DJ
ps Thanks OHM 🙂
Oh, whew… So happy to hear it.
Are you saying you have a RL outside of this? 🙂
Look forward to hearing from you. Take care of your RL and we’ll talk soon.
Keri
I posted my previous reply before I saw your new one.
Thanks for your insight. I’m very much enjoying the book too. Such fun.
My husband has literally blistered my behind so much that I had trouble sitting on the plane the next day (ouch! 🙂 ) and I was not even close to tears. It was so exciting knowing secretly my bottom hurt to sit. That was almost as good as breaking down, I think. Hehe
Also, dressed as a pirate on Halloween was fun too. I kept thinking of the pirate stories you wrote a while back and it made is secretly exciting. I was ‘disguised’ as a boy like your girl pirates did. Too fun.
Thanks again for insights and stories. I’ll go check out O.H.M’s blog and see what I find.
Keri
I’m glad you liked the pirate stories – they were loosely based on fact.
Which book do you mean?
I am glad to see that someone is taking care of you. 😉
DJ –
I’m reading the Spanking Handbook. I saw. It hear and thought maybe it would have some insights. I went to Sometimes a girl… Very interesting to say the least. I enjoyed most of it but some people didn’t get the ‘gist’ or spirit many of the stories were written in and that was a bummer. Otherwise, pretty cool.
Thanks for responding. I wish I could attend the alt market in London. It sounds very cool. I did notice there is a female friendly spanking group in Seattle which sounds interesting. I’m pretty shy about this for the most part but it sounds very discreet so I may attend a dinner and see what materializes.
Have a great week,
Keri
The market is pretty cool.
Glad you liked the book – it is just an eclectic collection and I only wrote the one chapter. 🙂
DJ –
First off – I meant to write that I saw the book advertised ‘here’ on your site not ‘hear’. Damn auto-correct! That’s what I get for posting on the train to work.
I enjoyed your chapter. It is interesting for sure although I’m more of a m/f spankee, even f/f, and some chapters address other forms. Male submission doesn’t work with my psyche but to each his/her own.
Are you currently in a relationship where you get to spank?
I wish I could find a book on the psychology of spanking because it fascinates to no end. Why do I like it and why do some men feel it’s natural to take a woman otk. I’ve tried to figure it out but I guess it’s crazy to work so hard to make a particular kink in your life make sense. It’s probably not as important and just making connections and trying to be a good person in all aspects of your life.
The Seattle based spanking group hasn’t replied to me so I’m taking it as a sign that I should just let it rest. It’s probably more than I need to take on right now.
If you knew your partner enjoyed spanking and you wanted to give an actual punishment spanking would it bother you that while the errant woman might really be sorry about the issue she was being spanked for, she was also turned on by the spanking itself or is that just sometimes understood?
How would one go about finding a spanking group, and would it be safe? I got my first real taste of hard OTK spanking when I went to a state school for the blind. I had a dorm parent supervisor who believed young ladies who were disobedient in any way must have their bare bottoms blistered until it was simply impossible to sit down without serious discomfort.
I am now 45 years old and single and miserable because I know my life would be much better if I were punished on a regular bases. I remember getting what were called obedience reminder spanking once weekly for a month from my dorm parent supervisor because he said I lacked good manners. Would it be possible for me to write about things like that here?
Welcome Patty,
Finding a group rather depends where you live I think. US is easier than the UK maybe – cities easier than country. I am sure others here will have some ideas.
As for writing about your experiences. If you were at a college aged 18+ then by all means otherwise it becomes difficult even when talking about oneself and ones formative years.
On another note – you say you are blind? I am pleased to know that this blog is reader friendly for the blind or is it?
Many thanks for your input.
DJ 🙂
DJ, blind doesn’t always mean you can’t see anything.
Keri,
Thanks Keri – I KNOW what you mean about auto-correct Lol 🙂
Also I agree about x/M spanking – totally off-topic here (no offence to the switchers out there)
I don’t want to get too personal in this public space – apart from anything else it may not be of interest to others.
But in answer to your question – yes 😉
Spanking psychology is a complex one and differs between individuals. It is hard to find a vanilla book on this because quite frankly most psychologists don’t get it unless they are a spanko. I never read any serious book that wasn’t point-missing psycho-babble on this subject, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one out there.
I think the short answers is – you can go insane asking why sometimes – maybe it is enough to know you are not alone.
As for the enjoyment versus punishment dichotomy – again people differ. Some women can’t be punished in this way and it is all a game. For others the satisfaction can only come from being punished and knowing that they have a ‘back stop’ so to speak.
It is common for women to be afraid of being spanked and yet crave it at the same time. To hate being spanked but love having been spanked.
I hope that in part at least answers your question.
DJ
DJ –
Thank you for sharing. You helped a lot. Sorry if I went a bit too far for this format. You were kind to answer each question in spite of that fact.
I’m glad I’m not alone. Thanks for sharing your stories freely and for such a nice, easy to maneuver blog.
Have a great evening even if you are a bit tired from watching our crazy election coverage. I appreciate your openness and how you included this long time lurker into the fold.
Saying goodbye (for now) from Seattle,
Keri
Keri and DJ,
I have in the past read Freud, Kraft-Ebbing, and Sacher-Masoch, and although some of what was said resonated a little, what I found there didn’t really put me in any meaningful way closer to understanding why I need to be punished especially with others observing. I am almost but not quite to the point where I have stopped asking “why” I need this.
There is no question that when I am punished that I view myself as a child. I regress. I regularly perform “personal grooming” which renders me as much like a child as I can be. I am totally opposed to real kids being hit, spanked, etc. Yet I view myself as a child when it is done to me despite the fact that I am an adult. I have heard explanations that the need to be punished is an attempt to reduce the uncertainty of being on one’s own as an adult, to have someone look after you. The person who punishes takes the place of a parent whose role is to protect and to love. That explanation at least makes some sense. But then why is there sexual arousal? I never had a sexual desire for either parent.
cindy
I think your feelings are common and indeed normal. Regression is a recognised therapy.
I received my first adult spanking on our wedding night. We had a lot to drink and went back to our hotel room. My wife showered first, then it was my turn. When I came out of the bathroom I had a towel wrapped around my waist. My naked wife got up from the bed and walked over to me dropping my towel at my feet and guided me back to our bed by my handle. As she sat down she pulled me over her knee and started spanking me giggling and laughing the whole time. Then there was a knock at the door. Who is it? My wife asked.
Housekeeping! I have your extra towels.
Come in!
What? I tried getting up to cover up but my wife was having non of that and held me in place.
As she entered she stopped dead in her tracks as she took in the scene before her. Sorry to disturb you, I’ll just leave these here.
No, it’s all right, please put them in the bathroom for me as my hands full and if you could bring me the hand cream that’s in there I would appreciate it.
Spank! Spank! Spank! OUCH ! Honey let me up!!!
Not quite yet dear. Spank! Spank! Spank!
Oh! Thank you.
My wife took the cream from the lady and soothed my flaming cheeks. Just as I was relaxing my wife flipped me over and started stroking me. I tried again to get up but my wife told the woman to hold my legs down and spread them for her. She did as asked as my wife picked up momentum. Just as I was about to lose control she slid a lubricated finger in me and started massaging my prostate until I lost control and lay limp backwards across her knees.
Cindy, don’t worry.
It’s absolutely normal and while you love to feel like a child, you’re also a grownup with sexual desires.Pls don’t believe so said experts and live it with responsibility and freedom… enjoy yourself and your femininity!
This is the third or fourth time I’ve come back to this account since I first read it. Despite, or perhaps because of the gender reversal, I find this powerfully erotic. It coincides very closely with some of my own wants and would-like-to-gets.
Thank you very much Jeannie for sharing this…
I am a 62 year old man. I read your story with great interest. I was spanked a few times as a kid in the 50s. I married young and had shared my fascination with spanking with my new wife, She shared that she had been spanked as a kid and that she couldn’t understand my interest as her experience was anything but exciting. In the first year of our marriage now nearly forty years ago I angered her mom. She waited until we were alone in the house and confronted me telling me I needed to be taught some respect. I asked what she meant and she told me I was not to old to be spanked. At first I thought it was going to be an exciting enactment of my fantasy. Then when she told me to go wait for her in a back room I got nervous thinking this was strange. When she entered the room I had decided I wouldn’t comply. Then she smacked my face so hard I saw stars. Then as she scolded me I just stood there . I had the strangest sensation just complete submission. She unfastened my trousers and yanked them down and she bent me over and started strapping me with a short leather strap. I felt like a little boy, she was quite strong and held me in place with one arm while strapping me with the other. She left strap marks all over my butt and legs . I was bare from the waist down but never saw her looking at me . She left me to nurse my behind and my ego. I was careful and very deferential to her from then on. My wife from time to time would reticule me in arguments asking if wanted her to call her mom. One session was more than enough, but all these years later I still think about it
I read just yesterday that a little over 5% of American girls age 18-24 recieve domestic discipline i.e. from parents, aunts, uncles, or some other authority figure in home (excluding DD in marriage). I found that interesting.
Those of you wondering about the “psychology of spanking” might enjoy my blog posts at http://startingoutspanking.blogspot.com/2012/08/a-spanking-new-theory-of-spanking.html and http://startingoutspanking.blogspot.com/2012/08/opponent-process-pleasure-from-pain.html .
Thanks Jenn
I will add you to the blogroll 🙂
Hopefully DJ will post more of the ever popular real spanking accounts.
Im from sault ste marie ontario canada lm a spanker love hereing about women being spanked seeing pics and vids live nexts to sault Michigan . Like to hear from women who like telling thier stories or meeting . Love role playing naughty school girl . Daddys girl ect .
One morning my husband told me I needed a good spanking as he grabbed my butt while I dressed. Don’t know what got into me but I wanted it. I asked if he was going to give me one, he asked is that what I wanted? I said yes and he said I’d get it after work. During work I thought about getting it and liked the idea. My husband spoke and texted me to make sure it’s what I wanted and to convince me that if he spanked me it would be for real. I agreed and even taunted him telling him he wouldn’t follow through. He was late getting home and I was to be in my blouse and panties waiting for him and nothing else. I left another message saying I knew he wouldn’t follow through. He called to say he was a few minutes away, be ready as instructed and I was getting a good spanking.
My husband looked handsome in his shirt and tie and slacks and as he came into our room he said nothing but walked briskly with determination toward me. I have to say I was turned on by the strength he exuded but I quickly became nervous wondering if I made a mistake almost demanding a real spanking. As I started to speak he firmly said get over my knee! He didn’t wait for me but rather pulled me over his knee and spanked me!
His swats were hard, firm and deliberate and my bottom was tingly and warm.
He stopped, leaned in and said the next time you want to leave me a sarcastic voicemail remember this. In one fell swoop my panties were yanked down and down came his hand! He spanked my bare bottom firmly and deliberately again but this time he brought his hand down quickly. With a firm grip on me I knew I wasn’t going anywhere as my husband gave me the first real spanking I’d ever had and also the spanking of my life (at the time),
He was in complete control and I definitely was not as I was getting exactly what I thought I wanted that morning. It didn’t matter how much I squirmed, squealed, apologized or promised to be good I continued getting spanked until he decided I was done.
I ended up with my bright red bare backside in the corner as my husband lectured me and changed his clothes.
I had a new found respect for my husband after that and I was even more attracted to him.
Since that evening I have received a few really sound spankings for very real reasons including once with his belt. I don’t get disciplined often but knowing I could be has really changed me for the better. Like all couples we have our moments and arguments it’s just that I know about how far I can go and how to argue more respectfully.
If I lose it and curse and get mean it doesn’t matter how angry I am. I know from experience I will immediately be turned over, bared and spanked!
Believe me, a darn good spanking hanging over my head has saved us a lot of heated moments. Nine out of ten times if my husband tells me I need a good ‘ass warming’ it’s not a threat but rather means I’m getting one.
Clothing shopping can be especially trying for me. I stretch my husbands patience and get a lot of support and warnings. Once the young salesgirl was trying her best and I got really snappy. Right in front of her he scolded me for the way I was treating both of them and then firmly said, “You need a good ass warming!” I immediately felt myself blush and apologized to both of them. We finished up, the sales girl rang us up at the counter. I asked if he wanted to get something to eat? He simply said ‘No you’re going over my knee.” My husband thanked the girl for her help and even tipped her.
We went directly home and I went directly over his lap and received a good spanking for my attitude.
All this because one morning I decided I wanted to experiment. Be careful what you wish for has never been more true!
Vickie
Sorry Vickie,
thank you so much for this contribution – I missed it 😦
One of the perils of commenting on these old threads I am afraid – sounds like you found a way to be 🙂
I liked the story and could put myself in the same position at times to be spanked and have them done every so often or every 3 days and told to go in the corner after with my butt showing.
The story is very true.
DeborahGifford
There is a running conversation on my forum “Sometimes A Girl Needs A Spanking II” from a woman who runs a boarding house with 8 college girls who she rents to very cheaply. The kicker is if they break any of the house rules she spanks them with a hairbrush or rod.
I don’t know how true this story is, but it’s been going on for quite some time, very detailed and I have yet to find a hole in the story. I’m a firm believer in fact is stranger than fiction, so I’m going with true.
This entry just refuses to go away despite it being four years old. I guess I’m not the only person fascinated by ‘real’ adult girls getting spanked.
I get a lot of those – more reality soon
This is one of the most interesting blog threads I’ve ever read.
Thanks – I get them occasionally – I had to close one on the same subject that ran to 256 comments as it crashed the blog. 🙂
I like a real spanking like the kind that goes on until I am sobbing. I finally opened up to boyfriend of 8 month that I like spanking. So we tried a few times. He spanked me until he was comfortable a few time. Than he spanked me until I safe worded out a few times. He gave me a few timed 2 minutes hand spanking a few weeks later which was pretty good. But they were always over my cloths. Than I told what I really wanted to try. Told him I wanted a no-nonsense real discipline style spanking until I am crying beyond my ability to make words. I wanted to feel the trepidation of relinquish my safe word. To have no time limit, no swat limit, no protection. I wanted to feel the anticipation of slowly pushing my pants and panties down myself, not knowing when its going to stop or how many I was going to get. I want to try to experience the thrill and endorphins surge of making the choice, to feel adrenaline rush to will myself of staying in position and take it, no matter how bad it hurt until I was crying out of control and feel that cathartic emotional release. He was very reluctant at first and we talked about it for days. I wanted him to start off slower and build up to be more intese. At first he wasn’t wanting to because he was concerned welts and bruises, but he really like the idea of see my bare ass for the first time. After telling him that I expected that. Its still took him over week before he realized I was serious. He finally decided to give it a try. We had to wait for his roommate to leave for the weekend. We got to his place. I slowly pushed my jeans and panties all the down my knees. He put me over his lap started spanking me with his hand really hard for a really long time. I mean after a good solid minute or so, than started with rapid fire smacks for another 3 while I was fluttering my feet like all get out. He finally let me up and I did that post spanking hop. I stiffened up, flew my hands over my ass as I pushed my hips forward and began rubbing frantically, as I was hoping up and down. I was far from crying but I sure was fussing because that was the hardest and longest hand spanking I had ever got. After I calmed down enough stay in one place. He went to his room and came back a pillow. He pulled off his leather but fairly thin office belt doubled it half and asked me. “Ok, are you absolutely sure, no safe word, no time limit and no swat limit?” I respond with a yes. “Ok, that means I decide when this whippin stops, not you, you sure that’s what you want, I mean it this belt spanking will continue until you are crying so hard you can’t make out words?” There I was jeans and panties down to ankles now. As I was still rubbing I looked directly into his eyes, I shuffled over and gently put my arms around him and hugged him. I gave him a long passainate kissed ever so gently and I and said, “Yes, please, I really do want to try this. So please don’t hold back but just start of slowly ok?” “You’ll get quit a few before I finish you off. Remember, your safe word is nullified the moment you laid over couch. I laid over the arm of the couch after he gave me his bed pillow to hang on too. He started in hard and continuous about one whack per second and it just seem to go on and on. I was fussing and yelling quite a bit every time the belt came down. Than right no where he startes beating my ass really and really fast. It took my breath away. I shoved my face I to my pillow and started biting it trying to muffle my screaming. He wasn’t stopping, instinctively I tried shouting my safe word but he ignored it and he kept whacking away. I was kicking and screaming and it seemed like it would never end. I don’t know how long it lasted but I finally broke into sobbing but he still kept whipping my ass hard and fast. When he finally stopped I was bawling so hard I was hiccup crying and my eyes were all puffy and stinging as tears were flowing. I just laid there sobbing. I couldn’t believe I was actually able to will myself to accept it. Its was pure release. Am I the only who likes getting spanked so hard?
Thanks Lori – what a great tale and so much detail.
You could try para breaks to make reading easier in long posts (But maybe it is a phone thing?)
What about the aftermath – was your bottom okay – could you sit down?
Have you found the courage to try it again?
Thanks again 🙂
My bottom was bruised up a little and had some welts for a few days. I couldn’t sit normally until the next day. I have a very high pain tolerance. It was so embarrassing doing that spanking hop, when I tried to apologize for acting that way, he admitted he like seeing me do it. Yes, I found the courage again 1 weeks ago. This time with a bamboo backscratcher we got at the dallor store. He light into me as fast as he could but only using medium force for 1 full minute as a warm up, we used a count down timer on my phone. He also wanted to see me to that hop, which I did both instinctively and because I know he liked it. That dam this hurt like the dickens even with medium force. Afterwards, he used his office belt again. I think we are going to do it about once a month now. But its embarrassing doing that post hop and I now know my what I hate, that dam backscratcher. Nothing that thin that stings so much should exist. While it did make me to that spanking hop he likes, I say burn them all. I’m mess, I know, I like what I hate and hate what I like. He also make me take everything down, he won’t do for me, so I have to prepare myself. I felt that release which is all worth it. But beware, those backscratcher are bamboo and will make you go boohoo especially using rapidfire flurry type swating.
It sounds like yo need a very high pain tolerance 🙂
Sorry, left out a few things. We decided to have this in our relationship for a while and examine it every 6 months.
As strange as this may sound, I’m not as bitchy towards him anymore and I more respectful not just towards him and others as well. I do like real spanking, I mean it isn’t worth taking if it doesn’t make you cry. I do like the after effect it has, I just don’t like it sometimes when its happening, if that makes any ssense.I love and I hate it. But, he always so sweet though, he holds me and strokes my head until I get my breathing under control and I completely recompose myself.
But again, bamboo backscratchers are evil, I thought it would nice to try because it was thin and not thudy like hairbrush or a paddle, I underestimate how it would feel. He used the flat part of the handle of that dam backscratcher. Trust me when I say, it stings like all get out, most likely because it smacks both cheeks simultaneously and with flurry type swats no matter how much force you use, the sting builds and builds. Either way, he wants to use it as a standard for my warm up spankings because he like me to do that spanking hop. I wonder if I am the only one who does that embarrassing post spanking hop?
Sorry about my misspelling too earlier.
A bamboo backscratcher ah? Hmmmm. I will have to they that out. Bamboo until she boohoos! I think I will go get one today and use it on my girlfriend Lori next time she crosses the line in our disciple agreement. I liked the post spanking hop you described. I might ask Lori if she would do that for me. Usually she just lays there and flutters her legs after I get done.
I never thought of using a backscratcher before. Its both checks at the sometime and won’t break. I wonder how she would react to full force swats if it got that kind of response with just using medium force. If it works as effective as you claim, maybe I’ll change my moto for discipline spankings to “bamboo until you boohoo.” Right now it is, “it doesn’t start until you begin crying.”
I haven’t posted in a while and I read about some woman have problems crying. I have an extremely high pain threshold too. I can definitely attest that it does take a closeness to your partner. But I feel its also a choice mixed with pain too.
At first, I would never cry and i had to examine myself a lot because my and I had relinquished all control. I used to have safe words, got rid of them. And once we switch to lighter less thudy implement like that first I asked him tear my behind up with that office belt (read below). Even after that first time, I still natural fought against it and would hold out and not cry.
What’s make me cry? I feel isn’t so much how hard spanks me but it was all about the psychological aspects and how he was spanking me. He started penetrating emotional barriers by trepidation and littering keeping me on edge and built the anticipation, especially for discipline ones. Like making me shuffle across with everything pushed down and actively rubbing my behind as I approached him like child. It starts that power exchange inside me and starts that relinquishing control. It starts bring down those barriers inside me.
I feel that allowing myself to cry and submit myself to the spanking is a great sign of respect for him. This might be because my man is a true spanko and he absolute feels that power exchange when he can spank me while I’m sobbing and just until I start shedding a few tears. I recognize he has needs too and II always want to please him. But what do you do when by default I hold back for as long as I can and fight against it?
The shuffling approach starts that but also the way he has learned to spank me. He knows I going to fight against it but at first he felt I was being resist towards him. It’s taken lot of talk and communication to work it all out.
It’s a journey and you learn about yourself and it takes time.
Before getting I to spanking potions, I lay over his lap and he rubs several layers of triple moisturizing gel/lotion over. This increase the pain and reduces likelihood of breaking the skin. It’s also really starts building that anticipation up. And oh he does that for a long time and it feels good but the whole time he reminds me that this is going to be a real spanking. There no safe word, its unlimited swats and he has every intention continuing until I’m sobbing. He also uses this time to start lecturing me about why I’m getting a discipline spanking and how much I disappointed him. This mentally prepared me what to expect, it raises the trepidation levels and it chips away at those emotional barriers inside me. It hurt me know how disappointed he is with what I did.
Than after being in position he would just tap me with the implement for a long time knowing he is going to literally explode any second. It really psyche me up because I know what’s going to happen. This is also a type of power exchange for him. Its dreadfully and utter anticipation for me but it’s truly does build that anticipation.
Especially when it’s discipline we’ve learned something to get past my pain tolerance physical and this really does help me get to the point where I’m crying. On top of everything I just mentioned, we discovered that it wasn’t a matter of how firm or how hard he would spank me but it was a matter of duration and intensity. Most of the time he would only spank me with medium force swats. It wouldn’t matter what he decides to use he always start out with fast and furious whacks as instantaneously as possible and keeps that intensity throughout the spanking. No warm up, he starts right in on a cold untouched behind to raging fire instantly. Before anyone says anything, this was my idea about the instant intensity start but only giving medium force whacks. Starting this way is very primal and emotionally takes me back to this inner child inside me. This gives me a shock and awe of stinging pain. It kick start that this is a real discpline not a maintenance or fun spanking. Again, he would always give me medium force but he would keep spanking me for a long period of time. I mean for several minutes. That truly help break down my pain threshold physically. So lucky me, I need to get a high intensity spanking for a much longer period. I than allow it to make me cry. I get the release, he feels respected, I’m pleasing my man and it is truly corrective at the same time.
Before anyone gets the wrong idea. He has never permanently harmed me. He is extremely careful never to whack my tail bone and while it has never happen he never had broken the skin but I know if he did accidentally break the skin he would stop immediately. He just want to get me to crying and I want to cry for him too so I told him to not stop until he feels I’ve submitted to him when it comes to discipline. There just nothing like not being in control sometimes that is a real turn on.
Most of the time he uses that dam backscratcher. The flattest part of the handle is the absolute worst stinging pain.
There are a lot of thing that go into crying, I feel it’s a full mixture of physical pain, getting through those mental barriers, a real sense of real trepidation and anticipation as well as emotional closeness to your partner. Its take time but now whenever I get a discipline spanking I’m bawling, crying and sobbing.
Any thoughts?
So much to unpick here – thank you for this lengthy and worthwhile contribution
🙂
My boyfriend knows I’m a submissive, and he knows I get turned on when he sexually dominates me. He knows I want him to lead, but it’s easier said than done, as I’m learning. We moved in together six months ago. It’s taken some getting used to, because we were both on our own for some time. We’ve been bickering for a couple months now. One recent morning I became angry because I felt he was being unappreciative of my efforts, so I pulled dry clothes from the dryer (that I had washed for him) and made a big scene of throwing them in the hallway and telling him that he could do his own laundry from now on. He went to work and I went about my day. He worked late that night, and I was asleep when he came to bed. The next morning I awoke to him yanking down my panties and pushing himself inside me, I tried to pull away from him, but he held me down, pushed a big dildo into my mouth hard, pulled my hair and told me he would fuck me however and whenever he wanted. Then he climbed on top of me and pushed an anal plug roughly into my ass and kept fucking me from behind. I was unable to move or get away, and the dildo was deep into my mouth, because he kept pushing my face into the pillow. He grabbed the wooden spoon from our toy chest and spanked me hard several times. Then he roughly grabbed my hair and stood up and told me to crawl. He pulled me into the hallway where I had thrown his clothes and held me tightly by the hair and told me to fold them. After I folded a couple pieces, he let me go and told me to do a good job and to come back to bed when I finished. He went back into the bedroom and shut the door. He left me there on my knees with my panties around my ankles and the butt plug sticking obscenely out of my ass. I folded his clothes and put them all away. It took me 10-15 minutes. I entered the bedroom quietly, not knowing exactly what to expect. He was laying down and told me to come suck his cock slowly. I got on my knees and did so. Then he told me to ride his cock. I rode him until he came inside me. I knew he wasn’t going to give me any pleasure, and I was embarrassed that I had to ask for permission to remove the plug. I was very sweet and agreeable after that. I apologized for my attitude. Later I commented that he had pulled so much hair out of me, because it kept coming out when I ran my fingers through my hair and part of my scalp was sore. He said I deserved it. Although it was humiliating, I’ve secretly masturbated remembering this so many times. I would be too embarrassed to admit that to him.
Thank you for that. It sounds Exciting – good luck with it 🙂
A fair question. She absolute hates discipline spanking. But she crossed a line, she caused a scene and knocked over my bike after I warned her three times. We actually just started with discipline spanking after she brought it up the past year for her temper etc. I’ve given her quit of few good spanking until she safe worded out for fun. We tried different implements, hairbrush, belt (what I use to use for discipline), and thudy paddles which were hard to use because I’m ever so careful not to hit her tail bone. After lots of discussion about real discipline, she needed to relinquish complete control of the spanking to me (her words not mine) in order to be effective. She likes being spanked pretty hard right up to her pain limit most of the time or however many swats we decide on at the time. That usually end up a number game as you know about. So she’s use to the spanking be painful. But discipline spanking “has to be unbarrable and has to push her past her pain tollerence and not just subscace” if you know what I mean, again her words not mine. So we both agreed that it has to be pretty harsh to make a distinction discipline and play. I’m usually more concerned about how hard and long I have to spank for discipline style ones than she is, she trusts me explicitly. She has a high pain tollerence which concern me as it relates to discipline. I love her more than words can express. So a year ago, I sat down with her and asked her what she thinks a discipline spanking be like and let her pretty lay it out for herself and than we talked through it. Because it has to be unbarrable for her to have true element of fear and not wanting to repeat it, we made some discussion accordingly. As for most, I think, her safe is nulfied, there is no swat limit and no warm up. I don’t usually spank her fast either so making it intense was and is pretty hard for her to handle, her suggest too. I’ve been looking for right implement to use. I’ve been goggle something’s and stubble here and saw Lori_Sign post. I so I tried it. My Lori absolutely hated how bad it stung but it was pretty easy to use OTK (my Lori’s only requirement, beside reserving the right to have a pillow to bit and cry in), easier to aim, so I never it her tail bone and it did smack both cheeks simultaneously. Its thinner in withe so it has a more considerate impact. My Lori is kinda petite so it was hard to end up the same spot over and over. She said it stung so bad she couldn’t go into subscace and it was truly something she didn’t want to experience anytime soon. We take Domestic Discipline serious and while the backscratcher left all kinds of surface welts it didn’t leave deep bruises like a belt which is harder to use OTK. I talked her about that spanking dance that Lor_Sign posted and my Lori wanted nothing to do with it. So I’ll have to maybe approach it other way. Hope all this made sense. My new motto for discipline spanking is “Bamboo until you Boohoo.” and boohoo she did and she didn’t like it.
DJ, there was no reply option to respond to Brad. I hope he reads this one. We need to tell Brad not to use a backscratcher on his girlfriend. I was sharing my story but I didn’t want to encourage others to use those dam things. I meant what I said, those things sting like the dickens. You don’t get numb to it either, the sting is like new everytime and it builds and builds, especially on the bare ass. Yes, I like real spanking but they should all be burned. Brad don’t use it on your girlfriend for a punishment paddling. I don’t know how you spank but using that dam thing with full force will make her scream from the very beginning and most likely in ways you never heard her scream before. I have a little behind so its not hard to end smacking the same spot over and over especially when I boyfriend spanks fast like he does. Whoever you are girl beware, don’t let him use it. I’m talking to my boyfriend about not using again but since he decides now, I don’t think I’m going misbehave anytime soon. Let me give a list of reasons why you shouldn’t use the flat handle of a bamboo backscratcher.
1. It smacks both cheeks at the sometime
2. You don’t get numb from it, every whack is like new. It a continuous shock and awe of pain.
3. Its not wide like a normal paddle, its thin and won’t break because its bamboo.
4. Its stings and hurts like all get out especially with rapid fast swats.
5. Its light weight and to easy to handle
BURN THEM ALL
There is a limit on a single thread – but you can reply to all at the bottom as you have done – that counts.
The backscratcher seems to have captured his imagination 🙂
On behalf of his girlfriend I certainly hope not. I talked to my boyfriend and we had a long talk. Thankfully he is only going to use it for punishment spanking and not emotional release ones every month and half to two months. I was so greatful. I tell you one thing, I won’t be earning a discipline ever, knock on wood, lol! But the trade off is that I have to do that post spanking hop performance everytime he spanks me good with his hand or office belt over his knee. What is it with guys getting so turned on by what they see? Anyways, it worth it as long as he doesn’t use that dam thing on me unless I earn a discipline one. It might even disappear all of a suddthat’s a thought. Have you even been spanked with one like I did? Do you have to or ever did that post hop before?
Thanks for the info 🙂
Here’s a good story:
http://www.saxon-web.co.uk/fiction/htm/novels/engagement/index.shtml#.V0h9dC_D-bM
Thanks 🙂
Wow, its ironic my girlfriends name is Lori too. But that backscrater idea was perfect. My Lori pushed over my motorcycle after warning her twice not to get near it when we were at a family get together. On our way home, we went to dollar store and pick a backscrater up, the kind that had a flat handle and not the roller balls. We got and she knew she was getting it good. She was begging for it no so hard. Don’t remember exactly what was said but I will try. Taking her to our room by the hand as she steps back defensively. Lori, this is going to be a discipline one that for are, so there’s hand no warm up and we going right to the bare, forget about your aft word, this one a real discipline one and best get’em all the way, its going to start off right on the bare.” “I’m sorry Brad, I know it was disobedience but please not a real discipline type.” “Lori, drop’em! She slowly undid her jean and pushed everything down. As she was laying over my lap she asked, “how many am I going to get with that dam thing? “You caused a scene inform of my family and disobey 3 times. I’m not playing no number game. It won’t be a short paddling and it I’m going whale an your butt until you are horse from screamining. Places her over my lap bare ass and took Lori_Sign advice here and I light into her right from the beginning her and fast a I possible could on. Cold bottom. Wow, on the to the time I had only smacked her 40th whack, she was screaming and bucking. I mean I paddle the dickens out of her for a long time. She was an absolute sobbing mess. The backscrater is a wonderful spanking implement. Its easy to control but she was perfect for rapid fire spanking. She had welts for a few days. Thanks for the idea.
If she consents to that handling and deserved it then it works for you. How did she feel about it all afterwards? That is the key.
A fair question. She absolute hates discipline spanking. But she crossed a line, she caused a scene and knocked over my bike after I warned her three times. We actually just started with discipline spanking after she brought it up the past year for her temper etc. I’ve given her quit of few good spanking until she safe worded out for fun. We tried different implements, hairbrush, belt (what I use to use for discipline), and thudy paddles which were hard to use because I’m ever so careful not to hit her tail bone. After lots of discussion about real discipline, she needed to relinquish complete control of the spanking to me (her words not mine) in order to be effective. She likes being spanked pretty hard right up to her pain limit most of the time or however many swats we decide on at the time. That usually end up a number game as you know about. So she’s use to the spanking be painful.
But discipline spanking “has to be unbarrable and has to push her past her pain tollerence and not just subscace” if you know what I mean, again her words not mine. So we both agreed that it has to be pretty harsh to make a distinction discipline and play. I’m usually more concerned about how hard and long I have to spank for discipline style ones than she is, she trusts me explicitly. She has a high pain tollerence which concern me as it relates to discipline. I love her more than words can express. So a year ago, I sat down with her and asked her what she thinks a discipline spanking be like and let her pretty lay it out for herself and than we talked through it. Because it has to be unbarrable for her to have true element of fear and not wanting to repeat it, we made some discussion accordingly. As for most, I think, her safe is nulfied, there is no swat limit and no warm up. I don’t usually spank her fast either so making it intense was and is pretty hard for her to handle, her suggest too. I’ve been looking for right implement to use. I’ve been goggle something’s and stubble here and saw Lori_Sign post. I so I tried it.
My Lori absolutely hated how bad it stung but it was pretty easy to use OTK (my Lori’s only requirement, beside reserving the right to have a pillow to bit and cry in), easier to aim, so I never it her tail bone and it did smack both cheeks simultaneously. Its thinner in withe so it has a more considerate impact. My Lori is kinda petite so it was hard to end up the same spot over and over. She said it stung so bad she couldn’t go into subscace and it was truly something she didn’t want to experience anytime soon. We take Domestic Discipline serious and while the backscratcher left all kinds of surface welts it didn’t leave deep bruises like a belt which is harder to use OTK. I talked her about that spanking dance that Lor_Sign posted and my Lori wanted nothing to do with it. So I’ll have to maybe approach it other way. Hope all this made sense. My new motto for discipline spanking is “Bamboo until you Boohoo.” and boohoo she did and she didn’t like it.
Ok, need some input. My boyfriend and I have been together about year. We’ve been into spanking the past 4 months up till now, its only been fun, erotic. Now my Jason has been doing more reading and thinks I could use some discipline in my life because I tends to reckless and I’m sometimes pretty head strong. I love and love and trust him explicitly. He brought of the 4 D’s of D&D to start with. I can’t really disagree with him either on a few things. I have a “leather butt” he can smack me with almost anything and it doesn’t phase me. We have a safe word, I use it all the time to get out it when it starts to sting a little. I’m a little controlling sometimes.
But even than he feels like it been plenty because I have such a high pain talerence but he get absolutely no reaction from me. One time when he tried to give me 60 swats and lay into me pretty good when we were playing. We always have a specific number. I just hold out until it over. That time it was only determination because he was going to whack me 60 times with his belt nice, slow like I told him too, but it didn’t phrase me, I safe worded out at 40. I think he’s getting frustrated somhow. But as we were disussing discipline spanking he suggested as a few things those site told him. Now I’m spooked. Theory and reality clashing here. He suggested I give up my safe word for discipline spankings and no no specified swats. But if I do that, I wouldn’t know how many I would getting and I wouldn’t have a word to stop it. That scary, I wouldn’t be in control anymore. Does this make any sense. I mean, I want this but what he’s suggesting would make it a real spanking that might really hurt.
My question is for discipline spankings does anyone else have these choices removed for discipline spankings. He is also suggesting no warm up for discipline. This disciple this thing is now getting out of control don’t you ladies think? In a discipline agreement is this normal? For discipline spanking, no safe word, no specified number of swats and no warm up? Are discipline agreements really really like this?
I’ve read this thread and I will definitely not be mentioning bamboo backscratcher my Jason.
Long or first comments are held – hence the delay. I have deleted your duplication.
I am not sure if I am clear about this or can give the best advice but …
Usually discipline is not discussed and agreed with the top except in general terms well in advance of something coming up. But trust here is the key.
If this is a serious disciplinary relationship and you trust him – then a safe word is not going to serve you very well – especially if you are topping from the bottom. However, I can see that the leap to giving him carte blanche is hard for both of you. There are different approaches – the main thing is for both of your heads need to be right. I can’t stress enough that if you are going to suspend the use of a safe word he must be acutely responsible and sensitive.
Corner time, grounding, lines etc can set a tone and make you feel more punished as a precursor to punishment – it can also be used when you take a break as you build up slowly and afterwards. Maybe setting you a punishment exercise with a time limit with a further punishment if you don’t take it seriously.
Another approach is – you can use a safe word but only once. Use of a safe word at all incurs a very real non-spanking punishment and use of it a second time during a period of discipline stops all activity – sexual and otherwise for a day (or three) an agreed time anyway. With this arrangement you have a fail-safe but one that you won’t use lightly.
Set swats might work without a safe word – if you know you can handle 60 (make the punishment 70 say)… warm ups help as they do set a tone (this is common and I do do this myself) but also they can sexualise a situation when a severe scene setting may be better if you are under topping.
Also ask yourself how far do you want to go. If he spanks you until you cry and you want it to stop – but it doesn’t – will you accept that as a cleansing positive experience afterwards or will you resent it?
It is not very PC, and not my personal experience, but I know of many women who first came to this where they had no control (school, home and other) who would not have discovered this side without it.
I wonder what others think – Ladies?
If it’s disciplinary spanking and correcting self destructive behavior you are both going for then it should be discipline. Discipline and punishment means that the one being punished does not have control of the situation. No safe words, no limited number of swats.
However from what I’ve read here I’m a little suspicious of your Jason’s intentions. I have the feeling that his intentions are not to help you become the person you want to be, but wants control. There is a very fine line between the two.
A great place for advice from people who have experience with domestic discipline and correcting behavior through corporal punishment WOULD BE my forum “Sometimes A Girl Needs A Spanking II” at http://www.voy.com/243310/ unfortunately the site appears to be down. Not sure why it is or if or when it will be back up.
The forum appears to be up again.
http://www.voy.com/243310/
Maybe it is just semantics, but I find OHM’s statement that “discipline and punishment” means “no safe words, no limited number of swats” a little troubling. What I have considered proper discipline has often been a limited number of swats, and I almost always felt able to get out of it by saying “please stop”, “stop you bastard” or anything else expressing that I no longer consented to be punished that way. Knowing that you haven’t taken that easy way out is an important factor in feeling better about yourself afterwards.
In my opinion, the problem here is not that Jennifer is allowed to stop a punishment (which is apparently what Jason wants to change), but that she uses it “all the time … when it starts to sting a little”. That’s not the way to face proper discipline and I could understand it if that was the source of Jason’s frustration.
yes iits normal. my husband does this w me. i make no decisions. i must always be nude and i must cry. these decisions are your boyfriends only. i know how u feel. dont argue do what you are told.
Honestly, I don’t know that many other couples and “domestic discipline” as described on many sites is … well, not my cup of tea. There are probably discipline agreements like the those your boyfriend mentions, but that does not mean anything to me, and, in my opinion, that should not mean anything to you.
Speaking just for myself, surrendering control (or to be more clear: making it harder to revoke consent) can sometimes help with the experience of being “properly punished”. However, for most of my discipline, I prefer having an easy way out and accepting the challenge not to take it.
From what you’ve written, keeping control is important to you, and that’s totally ok. Perhaps you should try to find out what exactly frustrates him and why. Perhaps there are other solutions than just copying an approach he read about on some site.
Good luck!
I want it relingish control but I don’t. I am hard headed and there are things that we both agreed needs correcting. My temper for one, he doesn’t want me on my phone while in the car without a bluetooth, texting etc. exessively not eating control my flat stomach and working out too much, among a few others. I’m very type A personality and I have a black belt in Kemp. The thing is, when it come spankings, I do use my safe word exessively. He’s no dummy but he always respect it but I’m sure he’s frustrated too. I do trust him but the thought of getting a real spanking that I have no control of is scary. Sometimes I do feel I’m disrespecting him too. Jason care so much for me. I even feel I could benefit from disciple spankings. Yes, I will admit I have control issues. I want to let go in my heart but my will says something different.
I’m just a mess aren’t I. I want what is scary, to give up control, and its also frustrating to always feel like I need to control too. I’m always sending mix message to dear Jason. Sometimes, deep inside somewhere I know Jason is right and I could use a disciple spanking, but to let go of my safe word is scary. Not knowing how many swats I would getting is the unknown. I don’t like the not knowing. Maybe I could use a my good sobbing cry and be vunable towards him in that way, sometimes I want it but than I wouldn’t be in control. I’m an absolute mess of feelings. I know I’m not making sense. Limiting how many times I use my safe word is an idea but than there is that trepidation of the unknown. Maybe I will muster the courage to surrender complely. I know disciple spanking are suppose to hurt and make you sob. Maybe the pain of disciple would be more preferable than the pain of regret if I’m pushing him away. I know I just a mess aren’t I?
I completely agree with your boyfriend – you need a real, discipline spanking
and without any options or safewords. Of course it will hurt, but that is what
spankings are intended to do – to punish and correct a wayward girl and make her realize the errors of her ways.
Before I married my husband, Lasse, I was young, pretty and irresponsible,
and while we were dating I was also seeing another man. One day Lasse
saw me kissing him passionately, and when he interfered and asked me to come with him, if I valued our relationship, I immediately did so. I felt that
Lasse was the man for me, but I wanted him to commit himself more and to
show me that was a strong and dependable man – also as husband material.
That was what he did that evening – he started interrogating me about the
other man, and when he found out that I had been on dates with him also,
he said that that was over, and I would be punished: Then I got my first ever
punishment spanking. He bared my bottom, put me over his knees and
spanked me long and very hard until I started crying, sobbing and begging
to be let up. I also apologized and promised never to see the other guy again, but Lasse kept on spanking until a was a sobbing mess with tears and mascara running down my face. When I was completely broken and just lay over his lap crying softly and promising to be a good girl, he did
something completely unexpected – he asked me to marry him. I was allowed to stand and rub and I must have looked a real mess, but he cuddled me and said that I had needed a spanking like that for a long time
and I would get more of them when we were married. I started to say something about not having agreed to marry him, but instead he kissed
me, and I knew that he was the man for me. I had just needed him to assert
himself and show me that he was man enough to control me when I had
these willful and irresponsible ideas – and that night I found out at the expense of a red and sore bottom that he was the man I wanted and needed.
Now we are married and I would never dream of kissing or dating another man, and I still get a hard spanking sometimes – not often, but so much and
so often that I have no doubt that he loves and cares for me enough to curb
my wild and willful side. There is no safeword for me, but there is security in his warm and caring embrace after he has spanked the irresponsible hell out of me.
Thank you Laura 🙂
I agree with this whole tread, Jennifer, you canxt play games and send mix messages to your Jason. Not sure what was the result since your post but I really believe you need a good blistering. May take a clue from others on this thread and hand him a backscratcher.
Swat limits: Sorry but I’m going to be honest here, it’s the not knowing that makes it a real spanking. In fact, when my man, Mark decides I’ve crossed that line or like few weeks ago when I lied to him, I knew I was in form it. And yes, that means unlinited swats. That right “a unlimited swat spanking” until he see fit. Granted, my Mark and I have been doing this for a few years but a if your really going to allow yourself to be discpline than take it. Completely surrender and do it out of love for Janson. Is it scary, yes but knowing there no swat limit while you are dropping your britches is half the mental battle of battle between, control and surrender.
Safe Word: Being completey honest here. You are playing games with him. If you are just safe wording out when you need a real blistering is selling yourself short. If Janson is half way as smart and if he is getting frustrated too, you will push him a way. Spanking even real severe ones is relatively safe as long as he strikes lower than the tail bone. Of you can trust him to do that, than, what the hell is your problem. A real spanking is suppose to be out of our control. Its come with the territory of real disicpline. A real discpline spanking shouldnt have a safe word. I do not and yes, my man doesnt play games.
It sounds Jason is on the right track. A real corrective discpline spanking is unlimited swats, starts one the bare with a implement and no safe word. A lot of people dont get warm ups either.
For Mark and I, we need to make it completely separete from anything sextual. I do a “shuck’em and Shuffle.” I keep all my cloths on but I have “anckle your jeans and knee your draws,” and shuffle over to him very showly from across the room. This gives me time to feel the tripidation, the power exchange and the mental prepration that it is going to be real. He puts his foot on a stepping stool. I hand him the paddle and he places me his massive thigh dangling at both ends and bent in half. After I’m in place, I have to tell him “Ok, I’m sorry!” He barely taps me over and over until he decies to begin. There is absoutely no warm up. It’s instant intensity, very hard and very fast and contines for a very long time until he is done.
Do I like it? Hell no but I trust me Mark and I completely surrender to him as my HOH. Are real spanking severe, yes. I too have a high pain tollerence. Does it hurt, hell yes. Does he make me cry and push me over my pain limit. Hell ues, he doesnt just spank me until I loose my composure, he spanks me for quit sometime while I’m sobbing. But than it’s over and he hold me in his arms. I feel dafe and loved.
You need to stop playing games with Mark. Any other thoughts?
I really laughed about the post spanking hop mentioned in this thread. While, I personally have not done this, I can imagine a man enjoy see this. I might do for my man next time I get a good maintance spanking and see how he reponds. I’d have to practice though, lol! Any thoughts?
Thank you – nice to see this thread pick up again. 🙂
I finally get it and I learn something along the way.
I really messed up big time and I lost my temper and was completely disrespectful towards his family. It was even in front of his teen cousin. He didn’t speak to me for days. Oh I knew in my heart that he had enough of my “shinnanigangs.” I knew deep inside, especially after reading the comments on this thread, what I had to do.
I know it’s been quite sometime since I posted. I was pushing him away. But all that ended when this event happen. After searching inside, I knew what I had to.do. I was scared but there was something embedded inside me that I was holding on too. After convincing him to come over so we can talk, it still took him three days to come.
I knew there wasn’t any words that was going to make things right. He finally came over. I just took his hand and led him to the side of the couch. I took my belt off, folded it half and placed it in his hand. At first he was hesitant and he said, “No I’m not playing games anymore and isn’t going to work beside. . .” I place my finger over his lips and said,
“No, I was the one playing games, this time I give up everything, I’m dont want to loose you, I rather loose my control than loose you. I know we both need this.”
Than I picked up the body pillow placed over the side of the couch and undid my jeans, I looked directly into eyes and said,
” no more games, no safe word, I’ll take whatever you you believe I deserve, I’m not losing you.”
I pushed everything down and lay over the couch. Oh man, I was so afraid but for once in my life I realized I really did deserve it.
Long story short, oh man he whipped my behind so hard and for so long. I never thought he would ever stopped but when he did. I sobbed and sobbed in his arms as he held me in his lap. I felt incredibly close to him. I can’t put in words just how recentered I felt, just how close I felt to him. Never in my entire life have I felt so tranquil. Than he said it. Those word that changed my life.
“I love you but I can’t let you run amok in our relationship. I love you and your forgiven.”
I just started sobbing even harder and barried my face into his chest.
Since than, we have gotten engaged and yes I’m no longer playing games with him. But it is still very hard not knowing but as was said early, it is the not knowing that makes it real. The same can be said about love. Love is a risk and it the unknown that we struggle with, at least I’m not alone, I have my Jason and he is now in charge and I find great comfort in that now.
Thanks for sharing that. It needs a lot of trust to abandon safe words but I have been there too – albeit from the other side.
You write so well about the intensity.
All the best and thanks again
DJ