Spanking and acceptance


spanking and acceptanceNot to be too presumptuous, judging from feedback I know that most of you out there like relationship punishment spankings and romantic spankings. This is pretty much where we are all at these days to a greater or lesser extent. But one of the things that first got many people’s attention when it came to spanking was hearing rumours around the neighbourhood about who still got ‘good hidings.’ Not those of childhood, which for some were an occupational hazard, but those of otherwise confident young women that you heard about just as you were stepping into adulthood.

The phrase ‘good hidings’ sounds extreme, but was about as graphic as it got. No one said spanking, it was too girly and the girls rarely spoke and as one got older, into sixth form, college, work etc, of course the frequency of such talk faded still further. I only heard of one 18-21-year-old still scared of his Dad’s belt by this time. Nonetheless, every scrap or hint that the confident young women around you may still be getting spanked was gold to a budding spanko.

The guys never seemed to have any reluctance to talk about this stuff compared to the girls, which is perhaps understandable. Yet stories from the UK and the US suggest that some women were spanked and seemed to accept that they would be.

One young woman, 17-20 when I knew her, was scared to go home even 10 minutes late because her Dad would spank her, or so she said. She might have exaggerated as she did later admit to a kink. She did on one occasion when she was 18, crash her father’s car during a driving lesson with him. Her boyfriend reported that he couldn’t see her for two weeks as she was grounded (kept-in we called it then) and added words to the effect ‘she won’t want to even think about sitting in a car until then anyway,’ or so the story went by the time she told us about it.

Around this time one of the Sunday newspapers carried an excerpt from some woman’s autobiography. The exact details fade now, but she did casually mention that she and her sister used to get ‘good hidings’ (that phrase again) right up until they left home. Again, this is not an anecdote of a childhood spanking, but one about two young working women who still lived at home.

Apparently her father would summon them to the utility room where they had to bare their bottoms and bend over the washing machine for licks of his belt. She told the story fondly, perhaps because according to her, her sister was mostly on the receiving end. She expanded on this by saying that one day her sister had gone out against her father’s wishes. She told of how sister had worn a tight sweater and a beret and was well in with the sophisticated jazz crowd. It amused her that on this night sister returned home stinking of fags at two in the morning and had gone straight to the utility room without being asked to bend bare-bottomed over the washing machine.

Another journalist wrote about seeing his sisters sent to the woodshed in the American Mid-West. He said he was immune from such treatment from the age of 16, but that his older sisters, by then adults, still had to submit while they lived at home.

He told of college-aged women, a teacher and his elder sister who worked on the local newspaper all having at some time or another having been ‘sent out back.’

Dad was an old-fashioned guy who would leave them to it for a while and then fetch a strop from the kitchen wall and then go and find them. He expected them to have removed any necessary clothing to receive the leather on their bare bottoms.

Again from memory, he said, “As a kid in my teens I would sneak out to watch. It was an early education on the anatomy of women. But by the time I was 19 or so I had a better sense of propriety and anyway they knew I peeked and were less prepared to tolerate it as I grew to manhood.”

He goes on to say his sisters were quite vocal during in their punishments and you could hear the fall of the strap throughout the house.

At the time none of this struck me as particularly sexist (which with hindsight it is of course) and at the time I certainly wasn’t interested in the social-politics of it, assuming that any of it was true of course. But assuming it happened at all then one wondered about the level of acceptance required for these arrangements. Did it fulfil a need? Was accepting paternal authority a kind of permission for themselves to explore something without the world knowing? Or was it out of habit? Why did they put up with it?

Most of us have probably moved on from such things and explore spanking more knowingly in our sex lives, but such things were the fuel for the seeds that we have within us.

spanking and acceptance

5 Responses to “Spanking and acceptance”

  1. 1 aceofspades21

    It may be sexist to spank daughters older than sons, but it also makes sense, especially if we\’re talking about spanking through the late teens or early adulthood. I have no doubt that this double standard still exists in many homes today. Is it unfair? Yes, perhaps so, but that doesn\’t make it wrong. In my opinion, it\’s far more unfair to treat older sons and daughters exactly the same, knowing that the differences between genders becomes more pronounced with age.

  2. 2 Laura Elizabeth Ander

    I grew up with a younger brother and an older sister. Mom discipline the girls and dad was in charge of my brother’s, which was mostly being grounded or given chores. Mom spanked me and my sister, mostly with a paddle or strap, but there was a cane too and she used it now and then. When my brother came home from college he was treated as an independent adult, but my sister and I were expected to do chores on vacations and mom spanked us as before, when she thought we needed it. She was even stricter with us on college vacations than when we were in high school, and she admitted to be. She said she’d stop the spankings when we graduated from college, kit’s true thatg they became less frequent, but they continued and even continue now when my sister and I are in our early thirties.

    Dad spanks mom with the same paddle and strap that she used and uses on me and my sister. She knows fully well what they feel like and why they should be used.

    I think I have benefitted from this upbrining, even with its double standard! I am very independent now, but married and now a mom. My mom is my role model. Boys and girls should be raised differently because they do different things as adults! So far my two girls get mostly hand-spanked otk. We have a paddle, a strap and a cane that so far have been used, weekly and as needed, on my behind, but I will use themn later to spank my girls. Dad discipllines our son pretty much the way dad discipline my brother. Sincerely, Laura

    • 3 aceofspades21


      It’s always great to hear there are still families that embrace the idea that girls and boys should be raised differently. I had a similar experience growing up as well. I’d be interested to hear your thoughts on a few related issues though. If you get a chance, please mail me at aceofspades21 [AT]

  3. Hi Everyone ! Blessings ! I’m new here. I’m 28 years old,but if I so much as utter a H _ _ l or D _ _ n, I find my self in my dad’s den, bent over a pillow, over the back of a sofa, sobbing like a baby and seriously regretting my Italian temper ! My dad is the most protective, loving and indulgent father ever and would kill or die for me, in a heartbeat BUT be expects me to speak, dress, act, behave, and live like a lady or look forward to dinner on a pillowed chair ! The spankings aren’t severe, more to remind me who is the boss, lol. It’s more embarrassing than anything else – having my dad see my undies and feeling his hand smack my bottom – but I don’t drink, smoke, swear, wear indecent clothing, or go to clubs and at 28 I’m still a virgin – all the way ! So you cannot argue with success ! Correct ? And yes I do find spanking sexy & romantic ’cause I connect it with being loved / protected / and cared for also I’m the docile, submissive type, the more I love you the more submissive I become so it gives me a chance to surrender to you however if it was severe or done in a degrading way, by someone who didnt truly love me- I WOULDN’T FIND IT SEXY AT ALL !!!!!! Not that that would ever happen – my dad is Mafioso ! ( *winks )

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