Spanking Vulcan’s daughter

19May10

Vulcan was displeased with his daughter. He had only been away for a day or two, to see to a few things in Hawaii as it happened, when hell literally started spilling over in Iceland.

“I can handle it dad.” Valerie had said.

“Are you sure? You know what happened last time, most of Europe was buried and under a cloud of ash, no wonder people don’t worship the old gods anymore.”

“How could I forget?” Valerie said ruefully.

How indeed, he had thought. The spanking her had given her for playing hooky with one of Neptune’s nymphs had been an epic one. Worthy of a god.

Now he had returned to find the mischievous volcano spewing yet more ash all over the Albion islands.

“Valerie!” He yelled. “Valerie Vulcan Daughter, you come here this instant.”

There was no missing the call of a god and Valerie had heard him well enough.

“Oh hell below.” Valerie cursed. “I am for it now.”

She had only intended to slip across the Atlantic for a short while to investigate the oil spillage there, but well, the Caribbean was so nice and the dolphins so playful. She really hadn’t expected that silly old volcano to flare up again quite so soon.

“Where can I hide until Dad cools down?” She said to herself.

“I don’t think Vulcan ever cools down.” Said a voice.

“Oh Mercury save me.” Valerie wailed.

“How am I supposed to do that?”

“Take me to see aunt Venus on your back, you can fly me there.”

“I cannot fly at the moment on account of this ash.”

“What harm can a little ash do?”

“I am sorry but its the regulations, Jupiter is very strict about that sort of thing.” Mercury said sadly.

“Valerie Vulcan Daughter.” Vulcan yelled again.

Valerie was about to flee when her father emerged out of the ground.

“There you are.” He growled. “I have a volcano spewing ash all over Europe again. I can’t leave you to tend an active volcano for a minute can I? What have you to say?”

“Well it is supposed to be the Land of Ice and Fire.” Valerie suggested. “I just added a little more fire.”

“You added a little more fire.” Vulcan nodded as if hearing sage words.

“You don’t do anything.” He bellowed. “I make all of those decisions. Have you any idea how this makes me look?”

“Powerful and feared and a very great.”

“Enough.” Vulcan scowled. “I have already had Mars asking if we were going to war and the Norse gods next door are very upset. They have accused me of poaching on their territory.”

“Sorry dad.” Valerie tried her best to look contrite.

“No. Your not sorry.” Vulcan laughed mockingly. “Sorry is what you are going to be after I have finished with you.”

“Please dad let’s not be hasty. After all I am 21 hundred years old, far to old to spank.” Valerie said backing away. “Again I mean.” She added remembering that she had only be punished in that way less than a month before.

Vulcan did not look impressed he just seized his daughter and upended her over his ancient knee.

“Dad don’t do anything you will regret in a millennia or so.” She wailed as her the back of her tunic was raised her leggings magically smouldered to ash.

Vulcan took no heed and let his arm fall with the strength and speed that only a god can possess.

“Yeow.” Valerie yelped.

Thor who had just finished dusting ash off his mountain on the outskirts of Valhalla looked up and grinned. At last that little brat is getting something of what she deserves, he thought.

The spanking was epic. If there had been any Roman soldiers around to sing songs about it, they would have sung a good one. Fortunately for Valerie the only Roman soldiers still around were mostly Catholics and did not believe in Vulcan.

But even without the prospect of a good song Vulcan spanked on for a good three or four days, such was his ire. By then of course, Valerie’s bottom was the colour of lava and twice as hot.

“I won’t sit down until the Olympics.” She wailed once her father was finished.

“That’s where you are wrong.” Vulcan bellowed. “You will sit on that volcano until it calms down.”

Valerie’s jaw dropped open.

“Please daddy can’t sit on a glacier?” She begged.

“Get your bare bottom on that lava flow and block it up before I sizzle your tail even more.”

“Yes daddy.” Valerie wept dejectedly as she slouched off to obey.

Thor, who had finished sweeping his mountain, looked up at the sound, a strangled howl like someone had sat on a hot stove.

Across the sea in Iceland, Valerie had and as she did so looked longingly at the glacier.

Ends.



6 Responses to “Spanking Vulcan’s daughter”

  1. 1 plaer

    fantastic, we in europ have to live with it

  2. 3 paul1510

    DJ, very topical, thank you!

  3. 4 O.H.M.

    Would this story be somewhat inspired by a dialogue on “Sometimes A Girl Needs A Spanking” http://www.voy.com/214955/ ? In this dialogue, King Minos implores his daughter Princess Ariadne to come back home and accept her punishment. Very clever dialogue. But anyway, always looking for a chance to plug my forum.

    • 5 DJ

      Eh? No.

      Was it along the same lines? I haven’t been following it sorry.

      DJ

  4. 6 opsimath

    He was Vulcan, but I’ll bet she was Thor! Sorry – I’ll get my coat!


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