Following up on the post about bridal spanking traditions, here as an overview of various spanking traditions pursued once the bride is safely married.
Margaret was married at 19 in 1963 by her own admission she had no idea about life and did not know what to expect from married life.
“I definitely believed the man should be the boss, most girls did in those days, so what followed did not surprise or bother me in the least. I just decided that’s the way it was.”
“When I lived at home I had got a good hiding whenever I needed one, even at 18 and 19, so the idea that my husband would spank me if I made a mistake seemed perfectly natural.”
“The first time was about a month after we got back from our honeymoon. David gave me £20 to get some things for the house. In 1963 twenty quid was a lot of money, I think maybe much more than a weeks wages then. I was supposed to buy some crocks [plates and cups – Ed] and the week’s groceries, but I had never had so much money in one go before. Despite being a wife, I was still a teen, so I stopped off at the record shop. I only meant to buy a single, but there were two or three ‘important’ records out that week so I bought them all as well as the new album by the Beatles. Then I saw this darling little jacket in a shop window. Well you get the general idea.”
“I knew I was in trouble even before I got home, even before David hit the roof. He was yelling and I was crying. I knew I had done something wrong, but I just wanted to make all the upset go away. I said he should just hit me and stop shouting, but that just made him crosser, he said it wouldn’t get the money back. As if shouting would.”
“I phoned my mum and she went mental, completely taking David’s side. She said my dad would come round and give me a good hiding. When I told David he got angry again and started yelling at my mum down the phone.”
“’Alright let us settle this,’ he yelled.”
“I was dragged across his lap as he sat in an old armchair, it had big arms so I was not very comfortable, my dad always used a kitchen chair. Then he started slapping me on my bum through my skirt. It hurt, but not much and I laughed a bit. So did David thankfully.”
“So he goes, ‘Alright how would your dad do this?’”
“As I said, dad would usually get a kitchen chair and his slipper. Then it would be over his lap with my jeans down or skirt up or whatever. Sometimes he would do it on my knickers, mostly as I got older, other times he would pull them down. I told David this and we both agreed that my knickers should come down.”
“I was really embarrassed about this, although I thought it was definitely the right to do and thought that dad would even at my age given what I had done. But it was also a bit funny. That is until David started in on my backside.”
“I had a good cry and we kissed and made up.”
“After that I got a good spanking about every month or so. Over the years, we used things other than a slipper and he often used his belt or a stick he bought in a junk shop. It always hurt and I always cried, but afterwards we always made up. We both felt very sexy after I had been given a good hiding.”
“When I think about it now, I think I sometimes did things to get a hiding so we could make up. It never occurred to either of us that this was not a completely normal part of a relationship. It wasn’t until the late 1970s when there was a story in the newspaper about a woman who had been spanked by her husband and it was reported as a bad thing, that we even began to suspect that we were abnormal. Not that we stopped. David asked me if we should. I was only getting spanked about three or four times a year by then, except in a sort of playful way. I said no, why should we give up what works for us.”
The next account is, presumably, from the US and from a bit later on.
Tammy was a bit more knowing about what she was getting into. She was still 17 and lived at home with her parents when she met Ryan. She wanted to get married at once, but her parents were against this. Then she had a pregnancy scare.
“Mom took a switch to my bare behind when I told her I was pregnant. Dad went white, I had never seen him so sacred. He took his belt to me when I found out it was a false alarm.”
“After that dad wanted us married as soon as possible but he made certain conditions. As I was still a kid and a bit immature, he said, Ryan should be prepared to carry on punishing me when I needed it. Ryan was not so sure at first, but I was quite excited by the idea and I was desperate to get married. So in the end Ryan agreed to dad’s conditions. There were a lot of them, including about where we lived and how often we came over.”
“At first I loved being married. I loved cooking and cleaning and playing house. Then I got bored. I went out with my friends to hang out in coffee houses and once or twice, we even went to a bar. I started neglecting the house. Then the arguments started.”
“I said to him one day that if he didn’t like it, why didn’t he punish me. That’s when I got my first spanking. It was only a few hard slaps on my bottom, but it soon turned into sex. It was a great way to end the argument, but it didn’t end my behaviour.”
“So one day Ryan came and found me when I was hanging out. It was embarrassing being dragged home like a kid in front of my friends, but it was also kind of cool. I knew I was going to get a spanking and I was quite excited by the time we got home.”
“Only this time it was different. This time he took me into the garage. He had set up a kind of trestle thing there with a padded leather top. Hanging nearby were straps and switch-like things. Not like mom and dad used, but shop-bought things. He told me to get undressed and bend over the trestle. Still very excited, I did as I was told. Then he stared to strap my wrists and feet. I started to get a bit scared, especially as he was real mad. The he told me he was going to give me a spanking that I would never forget.”
“That first time he used this leather paddle and gave me a real workout with it. I was yelling and crying way before he stopped. Then he gave me the lecture. By then, I was promising to be a good girl and saying everything I could think of. Then he started again until I was real sorry.”
“It was just as exciting afterwards, more perhaps, but I felt a lot less like I had gotten away with it.”
“It happened again about three weeks later. This time he used one of the switch things and I was real sorry. It was worse than anything mom had ever done. I phoned her the next day and she said it would do me good.”
“I guess she was right because I went out of my way to avoid a garage session after that, not that it didn’t still happen sometimes. Ryan still gives me bedroom spankings, but that is different. I don’t mind them at all.”
This last snippet is from another time and place.
In response to a newspaper discussion on wife beating Edith wrote:
I did not marry until I was 33. In those days it made me quite the old maid. My husband was a retired merchant seaman, 27 years older than me. He was used to getting his own way so whenever I crossed him I could expect to feel the cane across my bare bottom.
I knew what to expect before I married him and he was true to his word. I can’t say I liked it, especially as he made absolutely no secret of the fact that I was punished in this way. Indeed, I was once caned in the dinning room until I was crying loudly, while some friends sitting down for afternoon tea in our front parlour.
I do not say husbands should be allowed to do this or even that it never did me any harm and was solely for my own good. That is quite another matter. It is possible or even probable that no married couple would enter into such an arrangement today. However, if they did it would be no one else’s business but theirs.
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Tags: 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, adult daughters, corporal punishment, domestic, domestic discipline, marital spanking, public humiliation, real life spanking, spanking adult daughters